A Coach for the Coachless: An Intuitive’s Guide to Being Coached

 I know some of you here have been considering a deeper level of guidance in the form of Intuitive Coaching. But you might not be sure if it will work for you. Instead of trying to convince you that it will, I want to share with you the reasons why Intuitive Coaching doesn't work. As counterintuitive as it may sound, I believe it is more beneficial to understand what undermines the power of the process, so that you can identify if this kind of coaching is really for you. 

Intuitive Coaching is not, and does not work for everybody. And, here are the primary reasons (in no particular order):

Belief is required. If you are at the point in your life where you have crossed my path, and you are interested in connecting, you gotta be serious. Why? Well firstly, because I am (those who know, know).  And, secondly because this is Spiritual Coaching, this is neither for entertainment or self aggrandizing purposes. The few clients that I have that are psychic enthusiasts are missing out on the opportunity to really connect deeply with themselves, Spirit, and may regret not getting more out of the experience while it was available to them. 

But also….

Belief is not enough. For Intuitive Coaching to really work, you have to be ready to aid in your own transformation. Not only do you need to believe in something higher than yourself on a soul level, before we cross paths, but you have to acknowledge that belief is not the work.

Intuitive Coaching works best when you can take the guidance, process it, and take a real action --preferably before your next session. Change is much more comfortable with support. But, what I have noticed is that people often want to take it all in and save the actions for later, which is going to make it harder for them when they run into roadblocks, need support, and have more questions all while their transformation is loading. It’s really hard to read the manual, while flying the plane, listening to ground control and learning how to read. Be mindful that you have to set yourself up for success by implementing the advice and strategies when received. 

You’re not listening. Hearing and listening are two different actions. One is passive, and the other is active. Frankly, listening is hard. It is so very much a part of the work, and critical to Intuitive Coaching being effective. There are a lot of issues with the listening part, many moving parts, and it varies from person to person. But, those that have the most problems with this are using Intuitive Coaching in place of what they really need, which is therapy. Therapy is about talking, guidance is about listening. That's the primary distinction. Although I do understand how some may be confused by this.  For instance, there are many people on the spiritual path who often confuse stillness and meditation. But they are not the same. 

Intuitive Coaching has the power to help you prioritize reflection and a period of silence such that the noise in your life can change, and you can stop long-standing patterns and actively receive all things in a more profound way.

Doubt prevents growth. Intuitive Coaching is supposed to help you understand that while some things are challenging to overcome, some of your roadblocks have relatively simple solutions... like just setting a more powerful intention, knowing how to effectively pray, and establishing a consistent meditation practice. The guidance is there to help you connect with a deeper understanding of your purpose and your circumstances. Furthermore, it serves to help you see and accept painful truths about yourself and about the status of your relationships with others. 

Since we all have hard truths that must be received and processed before growth can occur. More than anything, this process is about encouraging you to lean in with curiosity, trust, and openness to the areas of your life where you have the most pain or trauma. Ultimately, learning to trust the guidance won't lead you to a breakdown, but ignoring guidance might lead you to a disaster.

Talking about stuff that doesn't matter. Guidance is an invitation to deeper awareness. Awareness of yourself, but also your environment. When things are difficult, or just mundane, we often don't recognize how significantly we are trapped in our own thoughts. And stuck in situations and circumstances that are only proving to be a distraction in our lives. And how those types of thoughts create isolation. Guidance is a powerful grounding tool, but you have to really allow it to seep in. 

Trying to be guarded. Pay attention to this one. It is really common and comes up a lot. People actually do come to a psychic and Intuitive Coaching, trying to be guarded in the process. This always fails -- in every and all ways. Arriving with defense up reflects you fears and the lack of trust you have in the process. Quite frankly, it illustrates (whether consciously or not) your feelings toward the coach.  Being guarded equates to being distrustful...be mindful of that when beginning or continuing a relationship with a coach.  

If you feel the need to be guarded on any level or if you have many things that are off-limits for discussion, Intuitive Coaching is not for you. Many of the issues around fear and boundaries are the things that Spirit points out first. Especially the fear, it is challenging to go very far on this path if you are afraid.  

Defensive behavior. Here's the thing, everyone comes to Intuitive Coaching because you need help with something. So be willing to receive help or ready to learn how to receive support and clarity about your situation. Defensive behavior is a sign of resistance, and resistance is not a pathway to enlightenment, openness is. Acceptance is hard, taking action to show up differently in the world is harder. No need to complicate things by making a difficult circumstance tense. Besides, I can't help but think every time this comes up, "who are you trying to pick a fight with me or the spirits?" True story.

Worried about attachment. Many people are fearful of becoming dependent on the guidance, and that either holds them back from exploring it all together or keeps them from being totally open in the process. No worries there because my boundaries are intact. I generally only work with clients for up to 1 year, and in the few instances I have made an exception, it was a Spirit-led decision and not of my own volition.    

I'm really drawn to all forms of writing, and quotes in particular. One that has really kept me grounded for many years now is "hold onto nothing and let nothing hold onto you." I actually dissected this all the way down in a group session a while back when attachment came up. If you want notes on this session, let me know, and I will drop them in your inbox.    

But, know that time is very finite, and my life has shown me that in many ways. To get the most out of connecting with me, you must come with a clear purpose and a desire to change the course of your journey. This mindset will allow the experience to be meaningful for both of us. And even if you don't feel like 1 year is enough time, I assure you that you will learn enough to be ready to meet your next guide.