Jessamyn Stanley
JessamynStanley-- I don’t even know when I first saw her, or at what point I learned her name. It was long after my early days in the yoga studio, in Bikram. I know that at my very first Bikram yoga class I felt completely out of place. I was one of maybe three black women in the room-- in Atlanta of all places. And one of the black women was the person I came to class with, so does that even count?
And, I was certainly the only person that was not a size zero. All of that definitely was a factor in me not coming back to class for a while and hindered my focus.
I was self-conscious. I believed that the reason I couldn’t do the poses was because I was too big or maybe yoga wasn’t for blacks people to begin with...that’s sort of how my mom made me feel—until my body started changing.
When I saw Jessamyn this first time, I wondered what my class would have been like if she was teaching that day back in 2009. Would I have embraced yoga sooner? Would I have instantly been at ease? It’s not just about Jessamyn representing a different body type, its about her realness, and how you can find yourself in her journey because she is not trying to be anyone but herself. Jessamyn is giving us all the permission slip that we have been desperate for---to take up space in the world, no matter what room you find yourself in. The journey to vulnerability is often hard, we lose connection with our voice because at every turn there is someone there trying to force their ego onto us. People don’t care for vulnerability too much these days. We have all subconsciously traded in vulnerability for perceived authenticity. Blame it on social media or just the way the world has evolved. Whatever the case, vulnerability doesn’t cut it for most people. And, those people are not my people (sorry, not sorry). Spirituality is all about vulnerability. Because to be vulnerable positions you to surrender your ego aspect for soulfulness. When you are open you have the ability to receive, and attract from true desire.
Yoga was how I began to understand why meditation was so important for me. Yoga forced me to keep my eyes on myself and thereby exposing all of my weaknesses, and my strengths too. In my early days my weaknesses were most noticeable, but as I kept practicing and leaning into spirituality itself, I gained clarity in my strength.
As we struggle to find places to belong in spirituality whether on or off the mat, people like Jessamyn give us an authentic place to land. Ever how controversial you view Jessamyn Stanley, she is needed and is making black history with her presence and by making room from a deeper conversation about what is means to practice yoga and to embrace self-acceptance.
Let me know in the comments who has inspired you to take your spiritual practice to a deeper level. And if you are ready to see if you and I can travel this road together in guidance, schedule time with me here.
And check out these episodes of the podcast:
Radical self-care in the year of alignment