6 Things You Need to Know About the Mother Wound
I have been offering intuitive guidance for a LONG time, and I have seen different modalities utilized, and some of them work extremely well; sometimes, it doesn't, though….
After helping many people reach their growth goals, one thing I have always stood firm on is this:
Learning for the sake of learning has an infinite return on investment. Learning on a soul level can last you many lifetimes.
That's a soul-level absolute.
Once you have faced that struggle that burdens you the most, you will open up opportunities for connections and create a direct pathway to expansiveness in creativity and closer proximity to your soul's purpose.
There's simply no way to have a more soulful connection with yourself and a more meaningful journey with Spirit if you fear addressing your deepest wounds.
The mother's wound is real. But, more than that, it's a heavy burden to bear.
In being more thoughtful about A Daughter's Sabbatical this week, I have come to a few conclusions you should consider.
1. Support is not the same as love. I know you know this intellectually, but things get murky when it comes to family, especially our mothers. We don't want to admit that often when struggling with a mother's wound that our lack of deep love and connection in that relationship affects all of our other relationships forward. And you will always struggle with vulnerability in platonic and romantic relationships when the first relationship you form brings you the most pain.
2. Most negative self-talk is in the voice of someone else. It took me a long time to realize that many of my fears do not belong to me. And the things that have held my mother back in life are her problems. If you are going to eliminate a negative stream of consciousness, you need to identify who the narrator is. Your personal narrative will always be impacted by the power of the most consistent negative thought you have. The question is, who are you listening to?
3. Anyone that is trying to control you cannot offer you sincere empathy. If your mother is or has been critical or disapproving of everything you try to do for yourself, she is seeking power over your circumstances. And what can complicate this is when something you do decide doesn't pan out, they often make you feel the pain with a little or a whole lot of "I told you so." "You should have listened to me." Or the one that comes up most for me is. "That's what you get." You can't learn what's right for you if you never get to make mistakes. And everyone deserves a soft landing with their family, but that is not always the case.
4. Pessimistic mother energy ALWAYS results in self-sabotage. A belief is only something you have consistently heard or have told yourself many times. So when you have had a parent that has been highly negative about your ideas, choices, or future plans, at some point, you have no choice but to believe it too. We self-sabotage ourselves when we don't have genuine sources of support. It's impossible to fully support someone while criticizing their every move. At some point, you believe in your support sources, even if it makes you sad or less interested in creating your unique path in life.
5. A toxic mother forces you to be solely dependent on them. Co-dependent mothers don't have healthy boundaries. I said what I said. A mother's role is to guide you until you can care for yourself. Our parents teach us everything we know in relationships, and we play out what we learn from them in our own lives. Read that again.
Unfortunately, co-dependency with our mothers creates weak boundaries with others. If you have weak boundaries, you will never honor your friends' boundaries or know how to navigate healthy boundaries in a romantic relationship.
6. Constant disapproval from your mother creates a perfectionist in you. I have learned from Spirit that perfectionist syndrome becomes a soul pattern when the soul fears judgment from others. But here's the sneaky little thing about judgment, you judge yourself harshly and then project that on others. Sadly, despite the fact that this was all born from constant disapproval, you begin to inflict pain on yourself and everyone else.
Look, the people that struggle with mother's wound issues have difficulties in every area of their lives until they face it. And facing it and giving sound and language to your pain will not be easy.
(Honestly, it's something we all wished we didn't have to ever consider as a part of our personal transformation journey. But what's the alternative?)
Because let's be real – we can talk about doing the "work," we can refill our self-care tool kit every week with crystals, sage, skincare, self-help books and even therapy, BUT what happens when that generational block you are trying to avoid comes to haunt you with fear, imposter syndrome, your boundaries are nonexistent when you finally attract the relationship you desire?
Yep, you guessed it – the same thing that always happens. You will play out the soul pattern that you are relying on right now because you haven't unlearned it.
This 6-week journey is next-level work. Many mother's wound offerings focus on the inner child aspect and rely on giving you a new childhood experience by your own design. So basically heavy on creativity and light on the guidance. But, as you are aware, you are an adult. And dealing with a mother wound is difficult when you ultimately want support and understanding from someone incapable of offering that to you. So we will focus on strengthening your actions by understanding more about the mother's wound, how to recognize it, and how to improve your personal narrative as you express and release stored trauma.
Ultimately you'll begin dismantling dysfunctional thought patterns that have kept you doubting yourself and build new language for your relationship with your mother and more compassion for yourself.
This experience is for you if….
You want to learn to honor yourself and prioritize your thoughts and dreams.
You can commit to doing the work and taking responsibility for your healing.
Having a soul pattern of trying to create "peace" by silencing yourself, seeking approval, and never admitting to your most authentic feelings
Are noticing that conflicts occur whenever you attempt to set boundaries
Need guidance that is super resonant and offers you real-time intuitive guidance.
Trying for years to improve your relationship with your mother, but it never gets better.
Fear you won't be a good mother figure or struggling with parenting now because of your past (or current situation) with your mother.
Healing your wounds doesn't happen overnight, but you have no opportunity to grow in your relationships when you don't face the things that pain you the most. This could be your year of balance and transformation, but only if you push for it.
A new beginning can happen in the intentional space that A Daughter's Sabbatical provides you.
Secure your spot here so I can support you in this healing circle that will be exceptionally insightful and a profoundly transformative 6 weeks together.